Oh, heavens. It's been quite the week. I have this issue in
my life where I really want to tell all of you all the things that happened
this week, but I do not want to type it all out and make it all coherent and
nonsense. I shall press forward, though, because I wouldn't be very happy with
myself if I didn't.
Remember our song? Yeah, it's pretty cool. Remember how we
were going to sing it for the Mortensens? Yeah, we did that on Tuesday. It was
quite the party. They have basically the cutest dang family in the whole world.
We sang our song, everyone freaked out, and then out of nowhere they decided to
go to Chill (The Milkshake Bar) to see their oldest daughter, Sophie. So, we
went to Chill, and we played our song for everyone there. Our high councilman
walked in right as we started to rap. #awesome
Thursday - yes. We went in for interviews with the mission
president, which I always really like. I was all excited to talk to him, but
when we sat down, I was basically chewed out. Now, I've never really been
chewed out in my life - I kind of avoid that sort of thing. It was honestly one
of the hardest things I've ever had to sit through. The basic idea of the whole
thing was that I wasn't living up to my potential, and that I was sitting in
this sort of comfortable mediocrity. I spent the rest of the training beating
myself up for being the worst missionary of all time and very much wanting to
just go home. After the training was done, President pulled me aside again and
asked what was wrong. I cried (again) and told him that I didn't know what to
do, seeing as I had no idea how to go from being the worst missionary in the
world to a good one. He explained that there was nothing wrong with me, he just
wanted more of me, that he needed me and that I could do so much more than I've
been doing.
I've spent quite a while soul searching these past few days.
I think I've just been so sick for so long that I got used to not doing too
much, and that put me into what President Mortensen referred to as my
"comfortable mediocrity." Was I doing anything wrong? Not really. Was
I doing good things? Yes. Was I doing all I could? Definitely not. He really
was just frustrated with me because he knew I could do so much more. It was
hard to swallow, and I've been doing a lot of repenting since then, but oh,
man, has it made a HUGE difference. We've been working so much harder, and I've
been happier - even though I'm freaking tired.
Whilst on our adventures this week, we had dinner with the
Ashbys'. I LOVE the Ashbys. After dinner, Hunter, their 14 year old, showed us
a Vine of Nora, a small child. Nora's sister walks up and says, "Nora,
you're off the list." Nora then yells, very loudly, "THAT'S NOT VERY
NICE!" It's hilarious. We've been quoting it all week.
I was also able to sing at the mission president's fireside
last night. It was an incredible experience - I'd been struggling with this
song all week, and once I decided to let the Lord help with the performance, it
went so well. All of the things I struggled with worked out perfectly, and it
was just great. So many people thanked me for it, and I was so happy to be able
to help them feel the Spirit. Ah - so cool.
I was also able to find out - from a most reliable source -
that I am being transferred, so I already knew when they called. I have no idea
where I'm going, but I'm pretty stoked. I'll be sure to let you know as soon as
I can.
I sure love and appreciate y'all!
Love, Sister Lil-jen
No comments:
Post a Comment